At 36 years old, I’ve bought and sold more cars than I probably should admit to. My pattern is always the same: I find something I love, I drive it for a year or two, I get bored and I sell it. A couple kids, a dog, and trying different hobbies will do that.

Back in 2018, I bought a BMW 335i with the M Performance Package. I loved that car. Truly loved it.  It was smooth, sporty, and handled with precision.  I kept it less than a year because we had a large dog, a 1 year old baby, and I started doing quite a bit of hunting.  I have regretted selling it pretty much every day since. My life has mostly been trucks — a 2012 F-150 Lariat, a 2015 Platinum, two different 2016 Lariats, and most recently a 2023 F-150 XLT built specifically for towing: long wheelbase, tow mirrors, max tow package. That truck was excellent at its job. Smooth ride, towed great, and hauled whatever I wanted.  But it was built for a version of my work life that isn't my life anymore.  Parking a vehicle that rivaled a school bus in a busy lot got old, especially because most of the time it wasn’t hauling anything.   

When my job changed and I no longer needed a heavy tow rig, something in me clicked. I'd been looking at BMWs online and in person for years at that point — window shopping, telling myself "someday I’ll get another one.” After the job change, someday turned into now. I knew I needed to get back behind the wheel of something that actually gave me the driving experience I'd been missing.

But I'm not the guy I was in 2018 anymore either. We have two kids and a dog now, and most days that crew rides in my wife's Jeep. I’m a pretty big guy at 6’ and I knew a tiny coupe or sedan wasn't the best option. So I spent real time — a couple years, actually — researching before I landed on a BMW X3 M40i.

Call it the dad version of my old 335i. It's got a newer 3.0-liter twin-scroll turbo inline-six, adaptive M suspension, sport brakes, around 400 horsepower and 400 lb-ft of torque, all sent through xDrive. In Comfort or Eco mode, it's smooth and surprisingly efficient — I've seen close to 30 mpg. Push the Sport button, select Sport Plus mode, and it's a different animal entirely. Sport Plus is the best of it: throttle response is instant and fast, the exhaust opens up, the transmission shifts harder and faster, the suspension plants itself, and the steering loads up heavy in your hands. To someone who doesn't know cars, it's just another X3 in a parking lot. To the guy in the Mustang or the Camaro next to me at a light, it's something to think twice about. All of that in a stock BMW dad-mobile off the lot.  There's enough aftermarket support on this platform that a downpipe, tune, intake, and exhaust can turn it into something pushing 600 horsepower, all while looking like a grocery-getter.

To the car dads, I know some of you think i’m crazy for talking about the performance of a X3. Obviously, I know it isn’t a M3 or a Corvette Z06. Those are high performance cars meant for a track. However, compared to every other small SUV, including the Audi Q3/5, or any Lexus product…….the X3 M40i does EVERYTHING better. I haven’t even talked about price yet. With plans to modify my car, I didn’t want to purchase new and pay a premium for warranties that would void the minute a tune goes on the car. I was able to purchase my X3 with 42,000 miles for just under $40,000. The value that this car brings to the table simply cannot be matched.

Here's the part that actually matters, though. I didn't just buy this car for me. My son has grown up hearing me talk about BMWs.  My dad had a few 7-series when I was young, I had my 335i, and my son and I go to car shows together and talk about this stuff constantly. After years of "someday, buddy," I realized if I didn't actually do it, I was going to look like all talk to my own kid. That's not the guy I want him to know.

So when we pulled back into the driveway after vacation and I finally got back into my own car instead of the Jeep, it hit different. We unloaded our stuff after a 6 hour road trip and I immediately hopped into my car to go for a drive.  That's the whole point of this car. Not the horsepower, not the mods. The feeling of getting back into something that's yours, that connects you to the road, and that your kid is watching you actually go get.

Don't be a boring dad. Have something you're chasing, and let your kids watch you chase it.

For me it's cars and golf. For you it might be hunting, fishing, mountain biking, camping — doesn't matter what it is. What matters is that you actually have it, and that you're still trying to get better at it, out loud, where your kids can see it.

My son has watched me talk about BMWs for years. He's been to the car shows with me. He's heard the stories about my dad's BMWs, about my 335i, about the one I sold and regretted. When I finally bought the X3, he didn't just see me get a new car — he saw his dad go get the thing he'd been saying he wanted, after years of just talking about it. That's the lesson, more than any car spec. Kids don't need a dad who has it all figured out. They need a dad who's still working on something, still improving, still showing up for the thing he loves — because that's what gives them permission to do the same when they grow into their own passions.

Boring dad has no hobbies, no passions, nothing he's chasing. Don't be that guy. Pick your thing. Get better at it. Bring your kids along for the ride.

What's actually in play with this car right now, on the list for down the road:

Nothing's been done yet — this is the "someday" list, same as the BMW itself once was. But this time I'm not waiting years to start.

Between work and finishing up my real estate courses, the garage content took a back seat for the last week — but getting back in the X3 after vacation was the reminder I needed to get back to this too. Next up: getting a proper Reel of the car itself, Sport Plus mode and all, so you can hear it instead of just reading about it.

See you next Sunday.

Tommy

Dad, founder, still figuring it out